Where: Davis County Hospital
When: Same
Setting: The E.R
Well after me crying my eyes out in the car we walk into the E.R and the lady behind the desk get WIDE EYED at the sight of my Z arm...my zarm. Well she tells me to sit in a wheelchair so they can take me to the operating room...Oh right I can't walk 50 feet cause my arm is broken! I walked from the parking lot to here! It ain't like my leg is a Z shape!
Well I'm sitting in the room and 1 doctor becomes 2...then 4...then 8 and then it seemed like the whole room just filled up with doctors all moving at 1000 MPH and my mom standing in the corner worried as ever.
Before I know it I have needle poking in me EVERYWHERE! I couldn't feel them because of my arm so that was good...but I still don't like needles.
Well since my Zarm didn't lay flat on the bed they propped it up on a tissue box so half of it was on bed and the other half on the tissue box. Let me tell you that was UNCOMFORTABLE! So I take my arm off and lay it on the bed. Well a nurse comes over and notices my arm isn't on the box and gets...mad is the easiest way to explain it, and asks who took my arm of. She turned to the nurse next to her and goes "Did you take his arm off the box? Do not do that". This was funny...and I needed all the enjoyment I could get, so when she put my arm back on the box and turned away I took it off. Again she gets mad and starts telling people to stop taking my arm off the box. She puts it back on and again I take it off...sadly she noticed and scolded me to keep my arm on the box.
I hate that box.
Well the next thing I can remember was someone asking me what color I wanted and I said red because that is my favorite color. Right after that I notice THE doctor has a HUGE needle in his hands with white crap in it.
My thoughts "Why does he have a bunch of Malk in there...wait...why is he putting a bunch of Malk in me...he-" and just like that I was out like a light.
So while I was asleep they put my fingers in these Chinese finger trap things (I do remember them starting to put them on) and they put a weight on my arm and had to re-break my arm into place.
From there the wrapped it up and went on their merry way.
A couple hours later I wake up and the room is empty...thank goodness...except for my dad.
I thought that I would have to stay the night so I wasn't to happy but my dad told me I could go home.
The last thing I remember is telling my dad my side of the story.
There are a couple things you should remember about this story.
When you don't know how you did something you shouldn't really try to duplicate it.
The outside duty is always WRONG!
Don't show your principal if you have Z shaped arm.
Rando men are the bane of every relaxing moment.
You aren't scared until you SEE the hospital.
Having a broken arm magically makes it so you can't walk.
Doctors multiply.
Don't trust the box.
Chinese finger traps can be used to re-break an arm.
And finally...LOVE THE MALK! Ees good for you.
SNAP! CRACKLE! POP! but not Ricecrispys! (The Office Part 2)
Where: Same
When: Same
Setting: School Office
So in Elementary the LAST place you wanna go for ANY reason is the office because you KNOW your in SOME sort of trouble, well even with a broken arm that was the last place I wanted to go!
Our principal was a FREAK!!! We were a school that taught Spanish as a subject because that was our extra special Preparatory class and all so the principal, no matter what setting or where we were, would walk in and make the "I love you sign" and shout "HOLA BABIES!!!"!
Lets just say a majority of the school wanted her out of that place (luckily that was the only year she was principal)
So when I get into the office with my Z shaped arm the freaky lady started to FREAK out! I thought she was gunna pass out she was so panicked.
They lay me down on a bed thing and the secretary reception lady just turns to me and says "how ya feeling"
"FINE AND DANDY! LET ME TELL YA! You know you guys can just give me a glass of juice and I'll be on my way"
Well I really didn't answer, I just closed my eyes and waited.
Well the freak of a lady comes over to me and says "ITS OK ITS OK WE CALLED YOUR MOM AND SHE IS COMING AND SHE IS GOING TO TAKE YOU TO THE HOSPITAL! NOW JUST RELAX AND WAIT HERE!"
1. I can't really relax with a freak in my face and 2. where in the world would I go with a broken arm?
I just wanted to get away from the world...well that place.
The outside duty is explaining what happened and she explained it ALL WRONG! She said I was doing some dancing move and I went to twist on my arm but it didn't twist when my body did...HELLO!!! IT WAS KARATE! This wasn't some stupid dancing accident! This was a battle scar for the epic ninja warrior I am! (that just so happened to mess up).
Well where there is 1 freak another freak is soon behind!
Some rando man walks into the office area and looks at me and what does he do...take a guess...come on... You know that I know that you know...HE FREAKS OUT!
Well he asks what the deal is and rushes to me.
"OK OK just calm down and relax"
"oh thanks mister! I was calm and relaxed until you walked in" I didn't actually say that
"OK think of things you like...do you like firetrucks?"
"Oh thanks mister! I grew out of that stage years ago" again didn't say that
"Do you like cookies"
I say yes just to get the guy to shut up but what does he do?
"WHAT KIND OF COOKIES!!!"
Holy heck!!! Go away!!!
"There is chocolate chip, snicker doodle, peanut butter, sugar cookies"
"OH THANKS MISTER NOW I HAVE A BROKEN ARM AND I'M CRAVING A COOKIE I WILL NEVER GET!!! YOU A HUGE HELP!"
While that guy rambles on I ignore the world around me and just shut my eyes.
Well that didn't last long because my mom walks in and....FREAKS!
I guess anyone would freak when they see there most favorite child has an arm in the shape of a Z...but I was tired of people freakin out!
So she rushes me to the hospital, I'm kinda in a crappy mood, and low and behold I see the hospital and what do I do...FREAK!
I had never been to the E.R before and I didn't know what to expect. All I knew was there was going to be needles and though I can handle em the thought of em is just horrible.
"I DON'T WANT TO FIX MY ARM!!! KEEP IT LIKE THIS!!! THIS IS GOING TO BE PAINFUL!!! DON'T MAKE ME GO!!!"
"THEY HAVE TO FIX YOUR ARM SO WE ARE GOING!"
"NOOOOOOOOOO"
When: Same
Setting: School Office
So in Elementary the LAST place you wanna go for ANY reason is the office because you KNOW your in SOME sort of trouble, well even with a broken arm that was the last place I wanted to go!
Our principal was a FREAK!!! We were a school that taught Spanish as a subject because that was our extra special Preparatory class and all so the principal, no matter what setting or where we were, would walk in and make the "I love you sign" and shout "HOLA BABIES!!!"!
Lets just say a majority of the school wanted her out of that place (luckily that was the only year she was principal)
So when I get into the office with my Z shaped arm the freaky lady started to FREAK out! I thought she was gunna pass out she was so panicked.
They lay me down on a bed thing and the secretary reception lady just turns to me and says "how ya feeling"
"FINE AND DANDY! LET ME TELL YA! You know you guys can just give me a glass of juice and I'll be on my way"
Well I really didn't answer, I just closed my eyes and waited.
Well the freak of a lady comes over to me and says "ITS OK ITS OK WE CALLED YOUR MOM AND SHE IS COMING AND SHE IS GOING TO TAKE YOU TO THE HOSPITAL! NOW JUST RELAX AND WAIT HERE!"
1. I can't really relax with a freak in my face and 2. where in the world would I go with a broken arm?
I just wanted to get away from the world...well that place.
The outside duty is explaining what happened and she explained it ALL WRONG! She said I was doing some dancing move and I went to twist on my arm but it didn't twist when my body did...HELLO!!! IT WAS KARATE! This wasn't some stupid dancing accident! This was a battle scar for the epic ninja warrior I am! (that just so happened to mess up).
Well where there is 1 freak another freak is soon behind!
Some rando man walks into the office area and looks at me and what does he do...take a guess...come on... You know that I know that you know...HE FREAKS OUT!
Well he asks what the deal is and rushes to me.
"OK OK just calm down and relax"
"oh thanks mister! I was calm and relaxed until you walked in" I didn't actually say that
"OK think of things you like...do you like firetrucks?"
"Oh thanks mister! I grew out of that stage years ago" again didn't say that
"Do you like cookies"
I say yes just to get the guy to shut up but what does he do?
"WHAT KIND OF COOKIES!!!"
Holy heck!!! Go away!!!
"There is chocolate chip, snicker doodle, peanut butter, sugar cookies"
"OH THANKS MISTER NOW I HAVE A BROKEN ARM AND I'M CRAVING A COOKIE I WILL NEVER GET!!! YOU A HUGE HELP!"
While that guy rambles on I ignore the world around me and just shut my eyes.
Well that didn't last long because my mom walks in and....FREAKS!
I guess anyone would freak when they see there most favorite child has an arm in the shape of a Z...but I was tired of people freakin out!
So she rushes me to the hospital, I'm kinda in a crappy mood, and low and behold I see the hospital and what do I do...FREAK!
I had never been to the E.R before and I didn't know what to expect. All I knew was there was going to be needles and though I can handle em the thought of em is just horrible.
"I DON'T WANT TO FIX MY ARM!!! KEEP IT LIKE THIS!!! THIS IS GOING TO BE PAINFUL!!! DON'T MAKE ME GO!!!"
"THEY HAVE TO FIX YOUR ARM SO WE ARE GOING!"
"NOOOOOOOOOO"
SNAP! CRACKLE! POP! but not Ricecrispys! (Recess: Part 1)
Whether I have written about this or not (which I don't think I have) this is by far my favorite story to tell. It will be split into 3 parts cause its SOOO long.
Where: NDPA
When: Sometime in November of 4th grade
Setting: Recess
"Hey Jason watch this"
Those words are what started a seemingly harmless and fun...game I guess you could call it that. Karate!
I look over and Mason G. does some goofy flip that he probably has never done and didn't even think about what he was doing.
Oh it was on!
I walk over to him and I do my flip that I have never done before and didn't even think about what I was doing. WHAT SON! Mine was cooler, naturally.
After those two flips we had some people interested in what we were doing and Javier comes up do me and says "DUDE that was so cool! You did something kinda like this *lame attempt to do what I did in slow motion* It was awesome" I think about these words and say "I'll do it again" I step into the middle of the field and a small group forms around me. Without hesitation I jump and twist in what I had in mind would be the coolest Karate flip EVER! But what came next was unexpected.
You know those moments when you know something bad is going to happen and the whole world slows down and you can see everything WAY more vivid than you want to. Well that's what happened.
I feel like I am hardly moving. There was a small group of girls around me and everything was black. Then I seem to freeze and I am looking at McCall. I can see pretty much every detail about her (though I can't remember). I go into total blackness and move inches. Suddenly I am looking at another girl (which I forgot what girl) and again I can see everything in amazing detail. Again the black overwhelms me and I rotate a little more. Next thing I see is Dusty Taylor and again in amazing detail. The thing I remember about Dusty was her "OH ****" Face and at that point I knew this wasn't going to end well. Again black, again rotate, and again light. McKenna Watts. Oh Mckenna Watts. EVERY guy (me included) had a crush on her. It was the simple fact that she was WAY nice to everyone and she was WAY beautiful. She had kinda a blank look and she was wearing a white top with khaki Capri's (we had a dress code at this school). Those brief milliseconds in real time seemed to last minutes in my Slow Motion time.
Sadly the blackness consumes me once again.
At this point I realize that the next thing I see wont be very good, and it wasn't. I can see one last thing and that is my arm fully extended to the ground and me falling towards it. My last bit of blackness and...
SNAP! CRACKLE! POP! but it wasn't Ricecrispys...'t'was my left forearm.
The snap was SO loud it seemed like someone fired a gun.
At that point I think "OH CRAP. This is gunna hurt".
Once I regain somewhat conciseness I get hit with the worst wave of pain my little chubby 4th grade body has ever had!
All the girls have sick horde faces on and I look down and see that my arm is in a total Z shape! Z! Not I like normal or L like when it is normally bent but a Z!!!
My thought was "AHHH I DISLOCATED IT!"...but you can't dislocate something in the middle of your forearm. But me being the dumb little kid I was tried pushing on it...BAD BAD BAD IDEA! Ya that hurt!
I run to the outside duty...well as good of a run I could manage...it was kinda slow and all over the place, but when I reach her she looked as if she had just seen a ghost! Ya my arm was bad!
"Let me run you to the office!
Where: NDPA
When: Sometime in November of 4th grade
Setting: Recess
"Hey Jason watch this"
Those words are what started a seemingly harmless and fun...game I guess you could call it that. Karate!
I look over and Mason G. does some goofy flip that he probably has never done and didn't even think about what he was doing.
Oh it was on!
I walk over to him and I do my flip that I have never done before and didn't even think about what I was doing. WHAT SON! Mine was cooler, naturally.
After those two flips we had some people interested in what we were doing and Javier comes up do me and says "DUDE that was so cool! You did something kinda like this *lame attempt to do what I did in slow motion* It was awesome" I think about these words and say "I'll do it again" I step into the middle of the field and a small group forms around me. Without hesitation I jump and twist in what I had in mind would be the coolest Karate flip EVER! But what came next was unexpected.
You know those moments when you know something bad is going to happen and the whole world slows down and you can see everything WAY more vivid than you want to. Well that's what happened.
I feel like I am hardly moving. There was a small group of girls around me and everything was black. Then I seem to freeze and I am looking at McCall. I can see pretty much every detail about her (though I can't remember). I go into total blackness and move inches. Suddenly I am looking at another girl (which I forgot what girl) and again I can see everything in amazing detail. Again the black overwhelms me and I rotate a little more. Next thing I see is Dusty Taylor and again in amazing detail. The thing I remember about Dusty was her "OH ****" Face and at that point I knew this wasn't going to end well. Again black, again rotate, and again light. McKenna Watts. Oh Mckenna Watts. EVERY guy (me included) had a crush on her. It was the simple fact that she was WAY nice to everyone and she was WAY beautiful. She had kinda a blank look and she was wearing a white top with khaki Capri's (we had a dress code at this school). Those brief milliseconds in real time seemed to last minutes in my Slow Motion time.
Sadly the blackness consumes me once again.
At this point I realize that the next thing I see wont be very good, and it wasn't. I can see one last thing and that is my arm fully extended to the ground and me falling towards it. My last bit of blackness and...
SNAP! CRACKLE! POP! but it wasn't Ricecrispys...'t'was my left forearm.
The snap was SO loud it seemed like someone fired a gun.
At that point I think "OH CRAP. This is gunna hurt".
Once I regain somewhat conciseness I get hit with the worst wave of pain my little chubby 4th grade body has ever had!
All the girls have sick horde faces on and I look down and see that my arm is in a total Z shape! Z! Not I like normal or L like when it is normally bent but a Z!!!
My thought was "AHHH I DISLOCATED IT!"...but you can't dislocate something in the middle of your forearm. But me being the dumb little kid I was tried pushing on it...BAD BAD BAD IDEA! Ya that hurt!
I run to the outside duty...well as good of a run I could manage...it was kinda slow and all over the place, but when I reach her she looked as if she had just seen a ghost! Ya my arm was bad!
"Let me run you to the office!
Lazy
Well with not having written a single post for some time and not having the ability to play WoW how I like it, because the defaults are extremely stupid, I decided to write a post.
I used to write a post about once a week but with summer in the happening I have become really lazy and don't have a drive to do anything...thus not having a drive to write any posts...also because I haven't been doing anything there is nothing to write about. But I finally got off my lazy butt and did something as of recent.
First on the agenda. Jake K. got his drivers license and we now have the ability to go places. Woo fun. The thing is I feel like I'm mooching whenever we are driving around...I would much rather drive. Gas ain't the cheapest thing in the world. Big fun, we love it, next subject.
3rd/4th/5th of July was last earlier his week and ya gotta love the 4th. As you all know the 4th was on a Sunday and we as Mormons have the thing where we keep the Sabbath day holy. So in retrospect we didn't have the big events on the 4th...which was neat. On the 3rd (Saturday) Kaysville did all of their jazz and half the nation went to that. 4th came around and people, I assume, did their family stuff. 5th came around and Layton did all of their jazz. It's awesome having the ability to go to the Layton and Kaysville stuff with ease (though I didn't go to anything Kaysville or the Layton parade...but I know of people who went to everything).
So on the 6th (which is now Tuesday) I realized we didn't light off our fireworks that we bought. So me being who I am got em out and lit em along with Jake, Nate, and Tyler, with Kandis watching. Well seeing that we are teenage boys with a box of fireworks we can do some, as most would say, stupid stuff...we call it fun stuff. Why sit back and watch a firework when you can hold it? Why stand yards away when you can jump through it? Why spray the fireworks when you are done when you can spray each other? You people don't know how to have fun!
The 7th (Wednesday). Well with the 7th coming around and Tyler's parents and sibling being gone me and Tyler not only had his house empty but mine as well with my family all at work. Can you say "Perfect opportunity to do something as none fun people would say 'stupid'"? Oh yes it was. As you have all heard of the fun thing where you get a gallon of Malk and drink it in under an hour and upon doing that, if you even do, you have to hold it down for another hour. That which is called "THE GALLON CHALLENGE!!!". OK so we didn't do the actual gallon challenge...more "THE 2 LITERS OF WATER CHALLENGE". We called it a training run. The goal for Tyler was to finish the whole thing in under 20 minutes...he did it in under 10. The goal for me was to at least finish it and I did it in 25 minutes...I can't drink big amounts of water. I would go into more detail but I will have the videos posted shortly.
The 8th (Thursday aka Yesterday). Well with nothing planned I watched a bunch of T.V yesterday until about 7 o'clock when I got invited by Amy to go swimming at her house. Fun (NO sarcasm). I love to swim. I probably have mentioned that somewhere on this blog. I have also mentioned me and Amy had a treading contest a while back. Well we had another. This time we went for OVER A HOUR!!! I got there at 8:15, we started about 8:30 and went to 9:50 when at that point I thought to myself "MOTHER EFF HOW IS SHE STILL GOING!?". We were both out of breath and about to die when I was like "this ain't worth it anymore and I'm going to end it before we both die". So I did. Well that took all the energy out of us and when we climbed out of the pool and lied down we both blacked out for a brief moment. Now I am a skinny kid and my mom says I don't eat enough so I have no extra energy built up to feed off of when I do something like that, so once I burnt through my initial energy supply I was eating myself away to get more energy...not the best idea ever...and it took me a while before I could stand up and walk...a long while...over 20 minutes. But now I know if I ever need to tread water for a hour in a life or death situation I can...that's about the only good that came outta that.
So that has been my week that I finally do something. Every other week I have been Lazy.
Peace out Girl-Scout!
Love you!
I used to write a post about once a week but with summer in the happening I have become really lazy and don't have a drive to do anything...thus not having a drive to write any posts...also because I haven't been doing anything there is nothing to write about. But I finally got off my lazy butt and did something as of recent.
First on the agenda. Jake K. got his drivers license and we now have the ability to go places. Woo fun. The thing is I feel like I'm mooching whenever we are driving around...I would much rather drive. Gas ain't the cheapest thing in the world. Big fun, we love it, next subject.
3rd/4th/5th of July was last earlier his week and ya gotta love the 4th. As you all know the 4th was on a Sunday and we as Mormons have the thing where we keep the Sabbath day holy. So in retrospect we didn't have the big events on the 4th...which was neat. On the 3rd (Saturday) Kaysville did all of their jazz and half the nation went to that. 4th came around and people, I assume, did their family stuff. 5th came around and Layton did all of their jazz. It's awesome having the ability to go to the Layton and Kaysville stuff with ease (though I didn't go to anything Kaysville or the Layton parade...but I know of people who went to everything).
So on the 6th (which is now Tuesday) I realized we didn't light off our fireworks that we bought. So me being who I am got em out and lit em along with Jake, Nate, and Tyler, with Kandis watching. Well seeing that we are teenage boys with a box of fireworks we can do some, as most would say, stupid stuff...we call it fun stuff. Why sit back and watch a firework when you can hold it? Why stand yards away when you can jump through it? Why spray the fireworks when you are done when you can spray each other? You people don't know how to have fun!
The 7th (Wednesday). Well with the 7th coming around and Tyler's parents and sibling being gone me and Tyler not only had his house empty but mine as well with my family all at work. Can you say "Perfect opportunity to do something as none fun people would say 'stupid'"? Oh yes it was. As you have all heard of the fun thing where you get a gallon of Malk and drink it in under an hour and upon doing that, if you even do, you have to hold it down for another hour. That which is called "THE GALLON CHALLENGE!!!". OK so we didn't do the actual gallon challenge...more "THE 2 LITERS OF WATER CHALLENGE". We called it a training run. The goal for Tyler was to finish the whole thing in under 20 minutes...he did it in under 10. The goal for me was to at least finish it and I did it in 25 minutes...I can't drink big amounts of water. I would go into more detail but I will have the videos posted shortly.
The 8th (Thursday aka Yesterday). Well with nothing planned I watched a bunch of T.V yesterday until about 7 o'clock when I got invited by Amy to go swimming at her house. Fun (NO sarcasm). I love to swim. I probably have mentioned that somewhere on this blog. I have also mentioned me and Amy had a treading contest a while back. Well we had another. This time we went for OVER A HOUR!!! I got there at 8:15, we started about 8:30 and went to 9:50 when at that point I thought to myself "MOTHER EFF HOW IS SHE STILL GOING!?". We were both out of breath and about to die when I was like "this ain't worth it anymore and I'm going to end it before we both die". So I did. Well that took all the energy out of us and when we climbed out of the pool and lied down we both blacked out for a brief moment. Now I am a skinny kid and my mom says I don't eat enough so I have no extra energy built up to feed off of when I do something like that, so once I burnt through my initial energy supply I was eating myself away to get more energy...not the best idea ever...and it took me a while before I could stand up and walk...a long while...over 20 minutes. But now I know if I ever need to tread water for a hour in a life or death situation I can...that's about the only good that came outta that.
So that has been my week that I finally do something. Every other week I have been Lazy.
Peace out Girl-Scout!
Love you!
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